As It Was Written
by Cody-kun
Summary: I was in love with him. It might have been sick, wrong, illegal, but there was no changing it. I'd discovered my deepest and darkest secret, and there was no going back. This couldn't be buried again. ItaSasu, Yaoi. Don't like, don't read.
1. Discovery

**Yeah, yeah. I know. **

**How many people thought I literally died? XD God, I'm such a lazy fuck. I'm so sorry. Oh, and of course I'm posting something new and completely neglecting the 12938290849302 other stories I've started. Yeah. I've got my priorities straight as fuck, yo. **

**Well, this is kinda cliche and I should probably be punched in the face for writing it because I'm completely unoriginal and I'm sorry. *sobs* I just...got the idea...and...it happened. BUT ON THE BRIGHT SIDE, IF ANYONE EVEN LIKES THIS, I'VE ALREADY PRETTY MUCH WRITTEN THE WHOLE THING ASIDE FROM SOME SMUTTY SMUT SMUT. So yeah. Maybe this will be finished within a month? XD**

**Also! My eighteenth birthday is in slightly less than two weeks! SO I CAN ALMOST LEGALLY READ THE SHIT I WRITE. AIN'T THAT JUST FANTASTIC?**

**I need to chill with the caps lock.**

**WARNINGS: GAY THINGS. INCEST THINGS. UNDERAGE SEXUAL THINGS. GOOD THINGS. BEST THINGS. **

**If you don't like this kind of stuff that doesn't give you a free pass to be a literal asshole.**

**Enjoy! And please favorite/follow/review because that gets me to update faster sometimes! :D Emphasis on the sometimes!**

**POV is Itachi's. c:**

**P.S. This was supposed to be a collab between me and PoisonedWright from AO3 (I really hope I spelled your name right! ;-;), but we kinda just stopped writing together and I continued alone and it morphed into this 17,000 thousand word spectacle and yeah. It was originally going to be a one-shot but I was like, "Hah no." Thank you to her for all the help she gave me! :)**

**Onward to incest!**

* * *

I sat cross-legged on my bed, crinkled papers full of nearly-incomprehensible data sprawled across the covers when, unfortunately enough, a knock on my door broke my fierce concentration. I nearly snapped my pencil in half and readied myself to send my unwelcomed visitor away with a glare, but then I heard my little brother's voice call my name, followed by another short, almost tentative knock. My expression softening and grip on the pencil loosening, I glanced up and saw him standing at the door, shuffling his feet and staring at the ground. He was frowning something fierce, and a deep crease had formed on his forehead between his scrunched-up brows.

"Is something wrong?" I asked, homework momentarily forgotten.

"Homework," he grumbled. "I need your laptop…if it's not too much trouble." He finally glanced up and met my eyes, looking more miserable than I'd ever seen him.

"You too?" I cracked half a smile and motioned towards my desk. "Go ahead. I don't need it right now."

Relief washed over his face and he muttered a quick "thank you" before scuttering to my desk and gathering my laptop up in his arms. Really, with all the homework he seemed to get nowadays, you'd think our parents would allow him a computer of his own. I made a mental note to ask them about getting him one the next time they stopped by to check in on us, though I didn't mind letting him borrow mine for the time being. It didn't cause me any trouble and I'd do anything to wipe that frown off his face.

"I have to meet a friend soon, Sasuke," I said, meeting his eyes again. "Will you be okay staying alone for a couple of hours?"

"Of course," he hissed, scowling. "I'm _thirteen, _Itachi."

I hid my smile behind my hand and nodded. "Just checking."

He rolled his eyes and shuffled out of my room, leaving me alone with a pile of work I really had no interest in completing. I threw my clock a sideways glance and soon determined that if I left now, I'd have plenty of time to finish this work later. I needed a short break anyway; I'd been working nonstop from the second I got home, and even if I was taking a break from these assignments only to combat another with Kisame, it was still appealing. I dropped the pencil onto my bed and stood, gathering my hair into a loose ponytail, sliding its holder off my wrist and securing it as I ventured into the hallway.

"Sasuke?" I called.

"Yeah?"

I stopped by his room, gently pushing the door open. "I'm leaving now. I should be back before dinner."

He nodded without taking his eyes off the computer screen, seemingly immersed in whatever he was working on, his fingers flying over the keyboard with ease. I shook my head, a small, sad smile on my lips. He was working much too hard for an eighth grader.

I locked the door behind me and was in my car and down the road in no time. Sadly, I didn't realize I'd left my phone at home until I was halfway to my friend Kisame's house, and, with a deep sigh, I turned around and headed back home. I made a habit of having my phone with me at all times—how else was Sasuke going to reach me if something happened?

_I'm too caught up with these assignments, _I thought to myself as I jammed the key in the lock and turned it. The front door creaked open and I rushed inside, taking the stairs two at a time. I figured there was no reason to bother Sasuke or alert him of my arrival—he wasn't expecting me home for two hours at least, and I was certain by now he was elbow-deep in homework. But as I stepped closer to my room, and consequently his as well, a small whimper made me freeze. My first thought was for his safety, and my heart began to race—but that whimper was followed by another noise that was much closer to a…moan. My curiosity piqued, I stepped closer to his cracked door, careful to step as lightly as I could to avoid alerting him of my presence. The floorboards creaked beneath my feet and I grimaced, hoping he hadn't heard, but the now-steady stream of noises coming from his bedroom assured me he hadn't. I inched closer to his door and, despite the nagging feeling that I was definitely intruding, peeked inside.

And what I saw took my breath away.

Sasuke was…_touching himself._

I took a step away from the door, my heart hammering wildly, but found myself inching closer again regardless of the reprimanding voice of my conscience. With wide eyes I took in the whole scene—or what I could see from my position. Sasuke sprawled across his bed, his skin flushed the rosiest red, his lower lip caught between his teeth (likely to try and silence himself even though he _thought _no one was home)...and I especially took note of the way his back arched when he stroked himself _j__ust right,_his fingers twisting over his cock with obvious finesse. I drew in a sharp breath when one of his hands disappeared beneath his shirt, and couldn't suppress the shiver running down my spine as his back arched again and a needy whine spilled from his lips. My eyes flitted to the computer, which was faced away from me and had Sasuke's complete attention, and I realized that my "innocent" little brother wasn't so innocent after all.

When he came a few minutes later—or it could have been hours, I was so engrossed—splattering his shirt with cum and moaning so loudly I was certain our neighbors could have heard him, I finally found the willpower to drag myself away from his doorway and into my own room. My breathing was ragged, my face was drenched with sweat, but the worst of it all was the absolute _throbbing _in my groin.

Even in the quiet stillness of my room I kept replaying the scene in my head, all of Sasuke's noises and the faces he made as they escaped his lips. I sighed quietly and forced the thoughts from my mind as I lifted my phone from my bedside table and slipped it into my pocket, using all the willpower I never knew I had to force my inconvenient erection away. After peeking out the door to make sure Sasuke hadn't heard me come home, among other things, and was still in his room, I quietly walked downstairs and outside, starting for Kisame's house once again.

My thoughts were a tangled mess and I drove robotically, hardly aware of what I was doing. Why had I watched him? Why hadn't I walked away? I couldn't figure it out—but the worst part, above all, was that some sick part of me had _enjoyed_ it, had gotten _aroused_ over it. I shook my head as I pulled into Kisame's driveway. Hopefully getting out of the house and away from Sasuke for a bit would clear my head.

* * *

When I came home later that evening, the first thing I noticed was that it was eerily quiet save for the sound of the television filtering in from the living room. Slipping off my shoes and starting down the hall, I raised an eyebrow in confusion and looked around as I turned the corner, wondering where my brother was. I couldn't help but smile when I saw that Sasuke had fallen asleep on the couch, curled up in a ball, his mouth wide open and little snores falling out. I shook my head and stifled a chuckle as I turned off the television, not wanting to wake him from his obviously impromptu nap and knowing he always came home from school dead tired. Once again my eyes fell onto his slumbering form, and I vaguely noticed he'd changed his shirt, the one he'd gotten cum all over—which, in turn, triggered a flood of thoughts I'd rather not have.

I covered him with a blanket and stumbled into the kitchen, trying desperately to think of _anything_ other than what I'd seen earlier. Or rather, what I'd let myself see. I clenched my teeth as a wave of heat washed over my body, and steadied myself by leaning on the counter. What was happening to me? I stood hunched over, breathing heavily for minutes on end, perverse thoughts crashing around inside my skull, warring with whatever was left of my conscience.

I was pulled away from the battle as two slender arms wrapped around my waist from behind. Surprised, I turned my head slightly to see Sasuke blinking sleep from his eyes, and I let out a long breath that I didn't realize I'd been holding. "Sasuke," I said, a smile tugging at my lips. "You fell asleep with the television on."

Sasuke yawned against my back, and I barely stopped myself from shivering. Did he have to be so close? He was so warm… "Sorry. I just got...lonely, I guess." Guilt settled in my stomach like a ball of led. God, he was still such a kid... "Oh, I put your computer back in your room, by the way."

I stiffened as memories from earlier swam through my mind yet again. It seemed almost impossible to escape them for any reasonable length of time now that I was home. "Did you finish your work?" I asked. Finally Sasuke pulled away, but I dared not turn my body around because, for the second time that day, I found myself painfully and inconveniently aroused by my own little brother. As if the thoughts alone hadn't been enough torture.

"Yeah," he said, shrugging his shoulders. "I could have used some help, though." My breath caught in my throat as I pictured Sasuke on his back again, pleasuring himself, asking for his big brother's help through a moan… I tried to play it off with a small chuckle, but it sounded forced even to my own ears.

"Sorry, Sasuke," I said, mustering up the willpower to turn around and gently poke his forehead. "Maybe next time."

"You always say that," Sasuke said as he furrowed his eyebrows and massaged his forehead. Sighing, he dropped his hand. "So what's for dinner anyway? I'm hungry."

"Hm," I said, pretending to think on it. "Why don't you choose? I'll make whatever you like as a treat for finishing all of your homework early."

The way Sasuke's face lit up reminded me of just how adorable he could be. It also reminded me of how 'adorable' he'd been with a flushed and sweaty face, and how downright tempting he'd been when he'd let his head fall back against his pillow, his dark hair splayed across it and his fingers loosely wrapped around his cock. My dick twitched in my jeans and I took a sharp breath, trying to conjure up whatever unpleasant images I possibly could to chase my arousal away. What the hell was wrong with me?

"Pizza," Sasuke said, successfully drawing my mind away from its internal battle yet again.

"Pizza?" I asked dumbly, raising an eyebrow at him. Sasuke rolled his eyes.

"You said anything I want, and I want pizza. Please?" Sasuke put on his most charming grin. "With tomatoes on top!"

I sighed and shook my head, a smile on my lips. I wondered if he still acted this childish with his friends, or if this sort of behavior was only reserved for me. I felt a twinge of jealously at the thought of anyone else seeing this cute side of him. "If that's what you want."

Without warning Sasuke flung his arms around my waist again, pressing himself against my stomach. When he nearly brushed against my groin I gently pulled him away before he could notice anything out of the ordinary, then ruffled his already-messy hair.

"I can't make dinner with you clinging to me like that, Sasuke," I teased. I was almost surprised by how normal I managed to make myself sound despite the situation and my own discomfort, but I've always been one for composure. I turned my back to Sasuke with a small sigh, expecting him to return to the living room to watch television(and definitely hoping he would).

"Um...Itachi?"

"Yes?"

"Can I help?"

I gritted my teeth. What was I supposed to do? I couldn't say no to such an innocent request—not without hurting his feelings or giving a good excuse. Sasuke always liked to help—something I'd been glad for until this point.

"Of course, Sasuke," I said, forcing a smile as he came to stand beside me, so close that I could feel his body heat through my shirt. _Again. _"Could you get two tomatoes, please?" I asked, using _an__y_excuse to put some space between us. He nodded and scampered off to grab some from the fridge, and I took a deep, deep breath. I needed to get these thoughts under control—they were ridiculous, not to mention _disgusting__._

"Is something wrong, Itachi?" Sasuke asked as he returned with two tomatoes in hand, concern written all over his face. "You look kind of upset…"

"I'm fine," I said quickly, turning away from him. I really needed to get better control over my myself—this was too unlike me. I grabbed a wooden cutting board from the cabinet and a knife from the knife-rack."Would you mind getting a jar of tomato sauce out of the pantry?"

I didn't need to see his face to know that he was pouting, but instead of the fit of protest I was expecting Sasuke merely sighed and walked over to the pantry, surprisingly compliant. He quickly grabbed what I asked for and set it on the counter next to me, looking for all the world like a brooding little kid. He was _pouting,_for God's sake. But the last thing I needed to be focusing on were his lips.

I turned my attention to cutting the two tomatoes, trying my best to focus even though I could feel Sasuke's eyes on me the entire time. Eventually, after one tomato lay in tiny cubes, I couldn't stand the feeling anymore. I sighed heavily and faced him. "Yes, Sasuke?" I asked, trying to make my voice as pleasant as possible.

"You're acting weird, Itachi," he said, crossing his arms over his chest. "I want to know why."

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. He was a perceptive little shit, I'd give him that. "What do you mean 'weird,' Sasuke?"

Sasuke groaned and struck a new pose: his hands on his hips. "You know what I mean, Itachi-nii." Ah, now he was using pet-names.

"I'm afraid you'll have to be more specific. I really don't know what you're talking about." I was more than thankful that my voice didn't waver with him staring at me like I was the biggest liar in the world (and maybe the worst). But I couldn't tell him that I had seen him earlier—and I _definitely_couldn't tell him that I had enjoyed the show. The more I stalled, however, the more I could see his annoyance grow.

"You know _exactly _what I'm talking about, Nii-san."

I continued to feign innocence; there was nothing else for me to do. "I've been working a lot lately. Sorry if it seems like I'm acting strangely; I'm just tired."

I saw the stubbornness melt off his face, quickly replaced with another look of concern. I was off the hook—or so I thought.

"Well, can you take a break tonight?" he asked, his hands falling to his sides. I saw hope glimmer in his eyes, reminding me yet again of how young he truly was. He always jumped at the chance to spend time with me. "We could watch a movie in the living room or on your laptop or something."

I squeezed my eyes shut and took a deep breath through my nose. _Not that kind of movie, Itachi__._

"Maybe tomorrow," I said as I opened my eyes, thinking of the mountain of homework still spread across my bed. His face fell into a scowl, but then he nodded.

"So...what else do I need to do?"

_You could go upstairs__. _"Could you get one of the crusts out of the fridge and spread sauce on it?" He nodded and got to work, and I turned back to cutting the second tomato.

A few minutes passed in silence as we did our chores, and all filthy thoughts began to filter out of my mind—slowly, but it was better than fending off an erection every time Sasuke opened his mouth, touched me, or even looked at me. I could only hope these strange feelings would be gone by tomorrow. I just wanted things to be back to normal between us; but I guess to him, things _were_ normal.

"Shit!"

"Language, Otouto," I muttered, turning to face him—and how I wished I hadn't. I gripped the knife so tightly my hand began to hurt as he slipped his shirt over his head, leaving his entire upper body on display for my hungry eyes, which took full advantage of the situation. I pushed a shaky breath past my lips and forced my mind to clean itself up before I...I couldn't even think about losing control—there was no way in hell I would.

"What happened?" My voice sounded unusually scratchy—rough, even—but Sasuke didn't seem to notice.

"I got tomato sauce all over my shirt," he grumbled, scrunching his white t-shirt into a ball and facing me. His eyes were still trained on the shirt. "It's ruined."

"Throw it in the wash," I said, my eyes roving up and down his chest. "I'm sure it's still salvageable."

He nodded and turned his back to me, heading for the laundry room. My eyes were glued to his pale, lean back down to the waistband of his black boxers peeking over his jeans until he turned the corner, and I found myself clenching my empty fist until that hand began to hurt almost as much as the other. Never before had I felt such...such _desire_ for someone. None of the girls I'd been with ever made me want to literally _rip their clothes off,_made me feel like I was about to _lose all control and pin them to the counter and ravage them and__—_

But what was I thinking? This was my _little brother._I'd never even looked at him this way before today—I'd never even looked at another _man_ this way before today. And Sasuke wasn't even a man yet.

I set down the knife and brought my hands to cover my face. It had to have been all the work I'd been doing lately; it was making me crazy. Maybe I _did _need to take a break tonight, to clear my head of all equations, statistics, and random bits of data. But I knew I couldn't, not while these repulsive, incestuous thoughts were swimming around in my head.

I heard Sasuke enter the kitchen and quickly dropped my hands away from my face; the last thing I wanted to do was make him worry about me more than he already was. I silently sighed in relief when I noticed he'd thrown another shirt on, but part of me...missed the view.

_Get ahold of yourself, Itachi._

He returned to his post at the counter a few paces away from me, and I turned back to the cutting board and its contents.

I had a feeling this was going to be a long, long night.

* * *

Aside from the shirt-staining incident and my mind twisting everything Sasuke said into something terribly depraved, dinner went by rather smoothly. We ate and chatted about our days, cleaned up, then retired to our rooms free of incident. But now, as I lied in bed, homework completed, I was faced with yet another dilemma.

It was as if my laptop was staring at me, testing my resolve as it sat 'innocently' on my desk.

But nothing about that computer was innocent to me anymore, nothing at all, and I found myself yearning to explore the browser's history, comb it for evidence that today had even happened. Really, I must have been going insane. I was sure that was a probable explanation—temporary insanity. Either I'd imagined everything, or it had happened and I, courtesy of my brain malfunctioning due to being stressed and overworked, had chosen to over-analyze what had happened. Sasuke was a teenage boy—of course he masturbated. But that still didn't explain why, after walking in on him, I'd stayed and somehow managed to enjoy _watching _him masturbate. This furthered my suspicion of me going insane. (If it had even happened, that is.)

I let my feet hit the floor and sighed. I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep until I'd cracked open my laptop; so I did, however reluctantly.

Of course Sasuke wasn't careless enough to leave behind any evidence; I was foolish for thinking he would. My baby brother may have been young, but he wasn't stupid. He knew to clear the history. However, he had no way of knowing that our modem tracks each and every page we click on independently of any browser—our parents didn't even know. I only knew because I was the one who had set everything up.

A couple of keystrokes later and a list of recently visited adult video websites filled the screen. I smirked at the over-exaggerated and terrible names—Hung Big Brother and Busty Sister Get Handsy, Big Bro Dom and Slut Sister Caught Mid-BJ by MILF—before the common theme, so obvious it hurt, almost stopped my heart cold.

_Incest._

I cleared my throat and swiped my bangs away from my face, suddenly much too warm for comfort. So my little brother had an incest fetish, it would seem.

I shook my head before I could start jumping to conclusions. Yes, Sasuke obviously got off to incest-themed porn, but there is a marked difference between fantasy and reality, not to mention the videos were _straigh__t_ porn and I definitely wasn't a busty little sister begging her big brother to plug her—

I grimaced. I could only hope his taste in erotic videos would eventually improve past this trash.

I shut my laptop and sighed. I needed to go to sleep. I was certain that once my overworked brain got the rest it deserved, all of these thoughts would fade away and I'd be left feeling how I normally did when it came to romance and desires of the flesh: uninterested and preoccupied with pursuits that mattered.

I laid back down and shut my eyes, allowing pointless thoughts to ricochet around inside my head and patiently waiting to slip into sleep. It worked for a while, allowing my thoughts to roam freely, but then they strayed to earlier that day and my cock began to swell.

I clenched my teeth and sucked in a huge breath, trying to clear my head. It didn't work, so I tried again. And again. And again.

Nothing was working. It was as though the harder I tried _not_ to think about the incident, the harder my brain worked to amplify the racy pictures in my head. Sasuke on his back, Sasuke with his pretty little fingers around his cock, Sasuke with rosy cheeks, Sasuke slipping his shirt over his head, Sasuke, Sasuke, Sasuke…

My fingers were drifting and I hadn't the will to stop them. I'd denied myself relief too many times today—but still, Sasuke was my baby brother. I couldn't get myself off to thoughts of him, I told myself, it wouldn't be right. But my fingers still drifted, as did my thoughts, and I could no longer control the direction either decided to take.

I pulled my cock out of my sweatpants, shuddering as it twitched in my hand. I was incredibly sensitive after denying myself all day. As I began to stroke myself I noticed that the friction was dry and slightly painful, but I felt that I deserved any and all discomfort—here I was, lying on my back, my hand around my dick and thoughts of my little brother masturbating himself my only source of mental stimulation. My stomach turned, but, I soon realized with no degree of uncertainty, not just from disgust. _God, _I thought to myself as my hand began to pick up some speed, _I've never been this hard before._

It was as though the complete realization that my brother had gotten me harder than a steel pole tripled my pleasure. I bit my lip, holding back the noises that were trying so, so hard to claw their way up my throat and out my mouth. It would be awful if Sasuke heard me.

There was no longer any painful dry fiction—oh, no. I was so disgustingly aroused that pre-cum dripped in excess out my cock and over my fingers, coating them and my dick, and it felt so good, _so fucking good _to finally touch myself I couldn't find it in me to feel guilty anymore. So I let myself enjoy it, stroking myself, twisting my fingers over my slippery cock. I enjoyed every single second of it, bucking into my hand and making desperate gasping noises I'd never heard myself make.

After I finally came, the moment of Sasuke's earlier completion playing behind my eyelids as I did, I began to reflect on what I'd done. Guilt settled around me, thick as fog, but as little aftershocks pulsed through my body I couldn't bring myself to feel as guilty as I _wanted_ to feel. The guilt was there, obviously, but even compared to this afternoon it was beginning to dwindle. This was by far the most frightening discovery I'd made so far.

I didn't even have a chance to clean myself up before I fell asleep, exhausted both mentally and physically. Waking up to sticky fingers, clothes, and sheets wasn't exactly the highlight of my morning, but it served as an all-too-real reminder of what I had let myself do the night before. I tried to reason with myself as I stood in the shower, under the warm, comforting spray of water, but I couldn't, and I found myself once again unable to conjure up the appropriate amount of guilt. It was as though I was coming to terms with this, this...attraction, perversion, whatever one would wish to call it. And it was terrifying me.

I got ready for school quickly and without much hassle, but I was rushing myself. Sasuke's school started an hour later than my morning class, and, seeing as we usually shared one bathroom even though there were others in the house, I wanted to do everything in my power to avoid running into him. It would seem luck wasn't on my side.

"You're up early," I said as I saw him patter into the bathroom, practically dead on his feet and his hair sticking up in every possible direction. His droopy eyes drifted to me and he nodded, then nonchalantly began to lift his shirt over his head, likely getting ready to hop in the shower. I almost choked on toothpaste and scrambled to rinse my mouth out, my fingers shaking and heartbeat wild. The last thing I needed before a long day at school was a fucking striptease.

I left the bathroom in a hurry and didn't give Sasuke a chance to ask the question plastered across his face before closing the door. (I nearly slammed it, that's how shaky I was.) There would be plenty of time for dealing with him later and I didn't have a good enough excuse for my behavior as of yet—but what I did have was a cock so hard I probably didn't have enough blood running to my head, because if my brain had been functioning properly my hand wouldn't have begun to press against my crotch as I stood outside the bathroom door, listening to the shower running and imagining my little brother soaped-up and naked.

But I soon stopped myself even though my cock was twitching and begging for attention and protesting like mad, and trudged to my room to grab my bag for school. Thank God Sasuke rode the bus; I knew I couldn't have survived being in the car with him, not in this state.

After willing away my problem the day went by as though I was either drugged up or terribly sleep-deprived. I felt as though I was watching myself talk and walk from outside my body, my actions mechanical, rehearsed, perfected. Nobody could tell how deep in the gutter my mind truly was. And it was practically drowning.

When I got home that afternoon I was worked up into a ridiculous state of frenzied, anxious arousal. I'd managed to make myself feel a bit more guilty about my incestuous thoughts throughout the course of the day, but that didn't stop my fingers from twitching and my cock from swelling and my mind from flipping through images so graphic I should have been appalled.

I refused to give myself relief. I had no other reason to withhold pleasure from myself aside from my malfunctioning moral compass; Sasuke wasn't home, and our parents were home once a month at most. I had the house to myself.

Instead of getting myself off (which I wanted more than anything), I went to my room and busied myself with homework. It was harder than usual to focus with my cock threatening to rise at any moment and the smallest thing seeming to set my mind off on a tangent, but somehow I managed to—eventually I was so preoccupied with numbers and symbols I didn't even hear Sasuke come home. It was only when he stood over my desk, his shadow falling onto the papers spread out in front of me that I finally noticed him.

"Ever heard of knocking?" I snapped. I didn't mean to sound so rude, but I'd finally managed to distract myself only for the little shit himself to yank my thoughts back down again. I didn't need to look at him to know he had that look on his face, the one he always got when I said something mean or inconsiderate. I felt bad, but held my tongue. With any luck he'd leave.

"You're acting weird again," he said. I took a deep breath and gnawed at the inside of my lip. I ignored him, refusing to answer, just hoping he'd get the damn hint and leave his big brother alone to drown in perverted thoughts and math homework. "Itachi-nii." He was persistent, but I knew if I could wait it out he'd have to leave. I was stubborn and he knew it. _"Itachi."_

Suddenly I was facing him; he'd grabbed my swiveling chair and jerked it around. Fed up with pretending I wasn't on the verge of committing mass murder, I let loose one of my trademark glares: the darkest in my arsenal, at that. In retrospect that might not have been the wisest thing to do, for the crushed look he gave me in return was one that still pains me to this day to reflect upon.

"Why won't you talk to me?" His voice cracked and he cleared his throat, trying to cover it up, but I felt terrible in no time flat. He hadn't done a thing to deserve being ignored and avoided; how could I be so mean to the person I cared about most?

"I'm sorry," I said, the stony look melting off my face. "I'm just stressed because of school."

"That's what you said last night, but for some reason I don't believe you." He stepped back, taking his hands off the arms of my chair and inadvertently allowing me to breathe again.

"You're used to a lot of homework; why's this time so different?"

"I've taken on a lot more than I'm used to this semester." It wasn't a lie, not really.

"Then why did you run out of the bathroom this morning without even saying good morning to me?" He crossed his arms; I knew he wouldn't budge until he got the answer he was looking for. I gnawed at the inside of my lip again. Where was my excuse for that?

"I was late for...tutoring." I saw the incredibility of my claim reflected back to me by the look on his face.

"You went to tutoring?" he asked slowly, drawing each word out. I almost cringed; it sounded even more ridiculous when he said it.

"Yes," I replied, careful to keep my voice serious. "I needed help understanding a new formula. I couldn't quite grasp it by myself."

He raised an eyebrow but I hurried on, eager for him to leave so I could distract myself with homework and leave this awkward situation before it got any worse. "Is there anything you wanted? I really need to get back to work." A part of me prickled with excitement at the thought of him requesting use of my laptop again. Maybe I could get another show…

He shook his head and I deflated. But then I mentally smacked myself upside the head for even entertaining the thought of peeping again, and swiveled my chair to face my desk.

"I'll see you at dinner, alright?" I said, picking up my pencil.

"...'Kay." I heard him head for the door, and then it was shut and I could breathe again. When I noticed I'd managed to stay mostly soft during our conversation, hope swelled inside me. Maybe this was going to pass.

Dinner was uneventful and Sasuke didn't offer to help me cook. We ate with minimal chit-chat, and aside from Sasuke asking if I'd like to watch a movie afterwards (which I _had_ to decline), it was free of awkward moments as well. Unfortunately, it was also Friday, which meant that Sasuke and I would be in each other's company during the next two days for longer than I'd likely be able to stand. I tried to keep myself from thinking about it.

Since distracting myself seemed to be a quickly-developing hobby, I ended up completing the entire weekend's worth of homework in one night. Sadly, that would leave me fending for things to occupy my mind over the course of the weekend, but I tried to distract myself from that fact as well.

Sasuke didn't come into my room again that night and I managed to get to sleep without too much of a hassle. But maybe I should have gotten myself off before I went to bed, because my body seemed intent on getting relief regardless of me being awake or not.

I didn't remember much of my dreams once I woke up and even less as the day progressed, but all I knew was that Sasuke, myself, and my bed had played starring roles in them. I didn't give it much thought, figured it was just my subconscious sifting through things. But, I also realized that this was the first time I'd gotten off to thinking about touching _him, _and not just him touching himself, even if I hadn't been conscious or in control of my mind. It might have seemed ridiculously belated, but that was the moment I truly, without a doubt realized that I wanted to fuck him—that I actually wanted to fuck my little brother. I guess I needed it spelled out for me.

Sasuke was still fast asleep as I helped myself to breakfast, but I ate as quickly as I could, hoping I could somehow get out of the house for the day and avoid being in his company for too long. He came downstairs a few minutes after I'd finished eating, looking absolutely _adorable _with his sleep-ruffled hair and messy pajamas. I clenched my fist and opened my mouth, ready to spout some ridiculous excuse for why I'd be spending the entire day out of the house, but he beat me to it.

"Can I get a ride to Naruto's? He wants me to spend the night tonight."

I could feel every muscle in my body relaxing for the first time since my accidental voyeurism. I nodded quickly and offered him a smile. He didn't return it, but I decided to let it roll off my back. I told myself that all of this would be over by Monday, and we'd be back to spending time together and getting along like normal. We'd be fine. I was sure I'd manage to work through my strange thoughts and urges over the weekend.

He headed to the upstairs shower and I took the downstairs, hoping to avoid any other unintentional stripteases and expediting the process of getting him out of the house. It's a good thing we keep all bathrooms in the house stocked with toiletries and shampoo, something I'd taken for granted until that moment.

I dropped him off at Naruto's around an hour later, and, as I stepped into the house again, I felt lighter than I had in days. I ignored how empty the house felt as I sat down at my desk, staring at nothing in particular, and decided that this was the time to lay all of my thoughts on the table—literally.

I ripped a piece of paper out of my notebook and held a pencil tightly in my hand. I worked through things best when they were written out in front of me, so, after a moment of careful and quiet deliberation, I began to write.

* * *

By Monday, things were not better. I had not found a magic remedy for my new-found perversion, nor had my budding sexual feelings towards Sasuke faded away. If anything, they were getting worse, and I was beginning to feel less and less guilt, telling myself that as long as I didn't act on these urges, I really wasn't doing anything wrong. This still didn't sit very well with me, and I couldn't fathom how I was to continue living life as though everything was normal and I didn't want to rip my brother's clothes off, kiss him, taste him, fuck him, _devour him… _I could hardly go a few hours without having the urge to touch myself to thoughts of him, for Christ's sake.

I'd written all of my thoughts down, reread it and reread it, and come to realize that my "feelings" might run deeper than I'd first imagined. Sasuke and I had lived a rather sheltered and private life, and we didn't have many friends other than each other. Hell, I'd practically raised him once our parents stopped coming home as often, which had been around the time I turned thirteen. He truly was the closest person to me. Even when I'd had girlfriends in the past, he still came first—he was still the person I looked forward to seeing every night. I even blew off dates to spend time with him. I hadn't thought anything of it at the time, but now, looking back on it and combining my past and current actions with this freshly-awakened sexual attraction...I came to the conclusion that there was a very good chance I was in love with Sasuke.

It had taken a few hours for the initial shock to wear off, and even then I'd talked myself down a bit. I'd never been in love to begin with, so how could I even know how that felt? And with a boy, no less? A boy I was _related _to? I shook my head and told myself it was impossible, improbable; there was no way.

But now, sitting at my desk on Monday night, trying and failing to focus on my homework, I couldn't stop thinking that there was a very, _very _good chance that might just be the case.

I tapped my pencil against my lower lip, staring at the papers in front of me but not truly seeing anything. I had an essay to write as well, but I knew that the moment I opened Word I'd probably start spewing forth some Sasuke-related nonsense and I certainly couldn't turn _that _in for a grade. I sighed.

There was a light knock at my door, and I momentarily stiffened. Facing Sasuke sure as hell wasn't getting any easier, but controlling myself was. Even if my control never failed to crumble the second I was alone again.

"Come in."

Almost hesitantly, Sasuke pushed the door open. He was still acting a bit stand-offish and we hadn't spoken much since he'd come home yesterday, but it seemed the two of us were content with ignoring any awkwardness and keeping our distance, at least for now.

"Can I borrow your laptop?" he asked. "I need to write a paper for English."

My breath caught and my heart began to pick up speed. Suddenly my palms felt sweaty, as well as the nape of my neck, but I nodded quickly. A plan was forming in my mind before Sasuke even touched the computer.

"I think I'm going to head out for a bit," I said hurriedly, before I had a chance to really think it through. "Will you be alright by yourself?" My voice sounded distant and muffled through the sound of rushing blood. I couldn't remember a time I'd ever been so excited so quickly.

He nodded, not even giving me his usual indignant retort, but my mind was far away. If I could see him again… I clenched my pencil more tightly and gulped. I knew I would regret it, but God, watching him…

It took me a moment to realize he'd already left the room, but once I did I leapt from my chair, grabbed my phone, wallet, and keys, and headed out into the hallway. I peeked into his room (the door was cracked open—I could only hope it would stay that way) then headed downstairs and out the front door. My plan was simple: get in my car, drive it around for a few minutes, park it around the corner, and sneak back inside the house to see if Sasuke was up to anything.

God, I was sick. I knew it, but I couldn't stop myself from trembling in anticipation as I started the car and began to drive. Within a few minutes I was back inside, taking the steps as quietly as I could. At first, disappointment settled in my stomach when I didn't hear a single sound from Sasuke's room, but I decided to be patient. No point in giving up yet. I settled against the wall, out of view but close enough to hear anything and everything that Sasuke might do.

It took a few minutes, but then I heard the sound of a video starting and the volume quickly being turned down. I smirked and crept closer to his ajarred door, being careful to stay as hidden as I could. There would be no lying my way out of this one if I were caught.

So far Sasuke was still fully clothed, just lying on his back with his eyes on the computer screen, but I could tell he was getting antsy. He squirmed a bit on his bed, letting out a small, breathless moan, before his hand came to rest against his groin. He gave himself a little squeeze before resting his hand against his lower stomach, and I felt a rush of heat spread from my head to my toes. I couldn't believe I was doing this. Last time was one thing—it had been an honest mistake, an accident. But this was something else entirely.

Suddenly Sasuke jolted upright and I jumped back from the door, my heart thudding painfully hard. Had I been caught? _No, _I realized as I ventured closer to the door once more,_ he was only shifting position._

Now Sasuke was on his knees, slowly unzipping his pants, his eyes never leaving the screen. I found myself wishing to know what it was he was watching that had managed to capture his attention so completely. He seemed riveted by whatever it was, and I made a mental note to check the modem's history again later. He was even more absorbed than last time, and as he pulled his pretty cock out of his pants (and never before in my life had I been tempted to call a cock "pretty"), I also noticed that he seemed a lot more worked up.

I wished he were naked but was more than happy with what I had: just watching him while he masturbated, while he thought no one was watching, while he let himself go… God, did I want him. My breaths grew shallower and shallower the longer I watched Sasuke toy with himself, and when he suddenly decided to lift his shirt over his head, I had to bite my lip to keep from making any noises I might regret.

His movements were jerky and unrestrained, his voice loud and shameless; I, on the other hand, had to be much quieter as I scraped my nails over my denim-covered cock. More than anything I wanted to pull it out and touch it properly, but the risk of getting caught watching _and_ masturbating was just too much.

"Mm, fuck," I heard Sasuke mutter, his eyes slipping closed and head falling back. He brought his free hand to his mouth, letting his fingers slip past his lips, and I squeezed my dick, practically on the verge of cumming just from the visual stimulation alone. After fantasizing about him for the past few days and replaying the last time in my mind over and over again, this was almost too good to be true.

His moans grew louder and he started to buck against his fist, humping his hand, and all too soon he came, cum splattering against his chest and a little even managing to splash towards the computer screen.

My eyes were blurry, my entire body was on fire, and I knew I was on the verge of making a mess of my pants—but somehow I managed to sneak towards the stairs, just in time to hear him mutter "shit!" and scramble around, probably trying to wipe his cum off the screen before it dried. I practically flew down the stairs, though walking with this bad of an erection was downright agonizing; but getting caught would undoubtedly be worse. By the time I made it downstairs I knew I needed to relieve myself, _fast. _I ducked into the half bathroom near the kitchen, closed the door as quietly as I could, and freed my cock from its denim prison. I fucked my hand hard, smearing it with pre-cum, bringing myself to ecstasy then plummeting over the edge, all while imagining Sasuke beneath me, whining, moaning, and mewling like a little whore.

God, did I want him…

* * *

When I came home that evening, yet another change had occurred within me—I couldn't tear myself away from Sasuke. It was like he had his own gravitational pull, and I was a planet hopelessly caught. We spent time together; we even watched a movie. But every time he brushed by me, spoke, smiled, did _anything, _my hands shook and my mouth went dry.

I knew watching him again had been a bad idea. Just when the fire had begun to calm, I poured gasoline on it. It was flaring hotter than ever now, and I feared it could grow out of control if I didn't pay close, constant attention to it. I wanted him like I'd never wanted anyone before; and now I barely cared about how wrong it was. It had been gnawing at my mind, poisoning me, and now...I was just going to have to live with it.

But God, just the way he looked at me made my entire body burn. Of course he mentioned I was acting strangely over dinner—hell, he'd even mentioned that my face looked flushed. But all I could do was watch his lips as he spoke and act like nothing, nothing at all, was bothering me. I'd gotten too good at that over the past few days, and he just seemed happy that we were spending time together again. He eventually stopped questioning me and instead suggested we watch another movie, which I quickly agreed to.

I knew at this point that if Sasuke ever were to spontaneously develop more-than-brotherly feelings for me, I wouldn't even feel guilty. I wouldn't care about his age, his gender, his relation to me—nothing. It seemed I'd worked through these feelings and concerns, and all that was left was one simple truth:

I was in love with him.

It might have been sick, wrong, _illegal, _but there was no changing it. I'd discovered my deepest and darkest secret, and there was no going back. This couldn't be buried again.

I guess I'd just have to live with it.

* * *

Later that night, after I'd masturbated myself to release yet again (as I said before, I could hardly go a few hours without craving it), my laptop began taunting me with the answers it held. With haste I booted it up and scrolled through the pages he'd visited that day, and I could already feel my dick trying to recuperate as little flashes from earlier played in front of my eyes. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath to calm myself down, but I knew this eternal horniness was inescapable.

"Damn it, Sasuke," I muttered with a melancholic little smirk. Then I opened my eyes and resumed scrolling.

I stopped breathing for a moment when I found what I'd been looking for before I pushed away from my desk and stood on wobbly legs. There was no way… I crouched down, stared at the screen until my eyes stung from not blinking, but the words...I just couldn't digest them. I read the same title over and over again before finally clicking the video link. Even then, I could hardly believe what I was seeing. _How on Earth…_

"Brother on brother," I breathed, as though convincing myself that what I was seeing wasn't just my overactive, oversexed imagination. The video wasn't too terrible, I noted as I sank back into my seat. It seemed legitimate by the crappy film quality and the way the two acted together, as though they were craving each other's touch more than the air they breathed. They even looked alike. There was ample dirty talk, but It didn't do much for me, as Sasuke's show still ranked higher in my opinion. But when it dawned on me that both of the brothers had dark hair and pale skin and seemed to have quite a difference in age...that was when the wheels began to turn even faster.

I was trembling all over. What did this mean? Surely...surely he didn't…

I exited out of the video and shut my laptop.

I needed to go to sleep.

* * *

**Well, hopefully that was better than I thought it was. Mehhh. I just...put so much work into that, man. *shakes head* But I guess I'm my own worst critic. I'm sorry for any spelling errors or terrible mistakes or whatever. XD I tried, but I don't have an official beta, so... *looks away* Also, I'm sorry if Itachi seemed too out of character. I dunno. XD **

**Reviews are beautiful things. *puppy dog eyes* Thank you so much for reading and I hope you enjoyed it at least a little bit! I'll try my best to edit and post the second part by Saturday, but maybe a couple of nice reviews could make that happen a little faster? c: (Or, knowing me, on time. ;-;) I'm totally not bribing you guys. Totally. **

**Have a good day/night/whatever it is wherever you live. C: **


	2. Action

**Whaaaat? A speedy update?**

**You guys are lucky this was already written. XD All I had to do was go through it and edit a couple of things, and boom! Done. Heck yeah. **

**Thanks so much for the positive feedback so far! C: I love you guys. *cuddlefucks all of you* You're all perfect and beautiful people~**

**So here's part 2! Warnings are the same as the last chapter.**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

My brother isn't straight. It should have been obvious to me. He never talked about girls, he never mentioned having any crushes or getting a girlfriend—he practically treated girls as though they had the plague (with the exception of our mother, of course). But he never talked about boys, either. I'd learn the reason for this soon enough.

Our family is relatively open-minded, and we don't care very much about a person's sexuality (or lack thereof). What matters is the person, not the label. Looking back, that's probably one major reason why I was able to come to terms with liking another man so easily. His age and the fact that he's my brother were of more importance, but, as I mentioned before, I eventually stopped caring about any of this. I couldn't change my feelings and I wasn't going to hate myself for something that was out of my control. I'd decided that I would just have to live with this terrible secret, this terrible attraction, and I'd come to terms with that as well.

But when I found that video...well, that changed things.

Now there was a possibility, a chance he could reciprocate my feelings. It was small and I hardly had a shred of evidence to back up my suspicions, but I latched on to it. I wanted him, _craved _him, and the hope I felt waking up that next morning was more than welcomed.

A plan was hatching inside my mind and I knew I _should _have felt sick to my stomach, but I didn't. I didn't care; I was too excited.

I was going to flirt with Sasuke.

Nothing too extreme, nothing too scandalous, but just enough to show him that there's more to his big brother than meets the eye. Just enough to make him question how platonic our relationship really was—or how platonic it would stay. Just enough...

Later that morning, when I stood in our bathroom brushing my teeth, my hair damp against my neck, Sasuke came in. Compared to last week, I was an entirely different person. I'd been so jumpy, so scared of catching a glimpse of what I wanted. Now I was at ease.

"Good morning, little brother," I said, a smirk on my face. I rinsed out my mouth and turned to face him, raking my eyes over his body as discreetly as I could. "Did you sleep well?"

He nodded, then yawned, then lifted his shirt over his head and tossed it into the hamper in the corner. I nibbled the inside of my lip, enjoying the view.

"How'd you sleep?" he asked, his back turned to me. He was fiddling with the shower faucet.

"Well." I pushed off the sink, getting ready to leave the bathroom. But before I did, I ran my fingers through his hair, allowing them to linger against his neck for just a second longer than I normally did. "Have a good day at school, baby brother."

And with that, I left the room.

I knew that wasn't much and he probably thought nothing of it, but to me...to me, it was something different. It was a step in the right (and morally wrong) direction.

School dragged on; all I wanted was to be home with Sasuke. More than once I had to snap my attention back to the professor's lecture and each time my mind began to drift again. I was trying to decide what I would do, how this would work. How I could make my feelings for Sasuke known without overstepping the invisible boundary that existed between us. It would be tricky work, I knew that much, but if everything worked out it would be more than worth it.

I was restless, but thankfully my latest afternoon class was cancelled that day, meaning I got to go home a couple hours early. But once I got home, my restlessness tripled.

I sat down and tried to focus on my homework (there was a pretty light load for that night, thankfully enough), but I couldn't. This was even worse than when I'd tried to deny my feelings for Sasuke—at least then I'd been able to distract myself. Now it seemed impossible. My mind was entertaining possibility after possibility without pause.

Eventually I was able to start on the essay I'd been putting off, but my mind was still preoccupied. I was nervous, odd as it was for me. But I told myself things would be fine—not that I really believed it. I'd been wrong before.

When I heard the front door open and close I was on my feet in a flash. I paused right in front of my door, knowing it would seem awfully strange for me to bound downstairs just to greet Sasuke. So I sat back down at my desk, and tried to work on my essay some more.

Within five minutes (not that I was counting), Sasuke came into my room, a half-eaten apple in hand. I didn't even reprimand him for not knocking—I was too happy to see him—but I turned back to my computer screen after glancing at him, trying to act uninterested.

"Hi," he said before taking a bite of his apple. I could hear the crunch.

"Hi," I said, feigning interest in the blurring words in front of me. My heart was beginning to pick up speed just from him being in the room, and it was difficult to keep my voice steady. "How was your day?"

"Boring." I heard him plop onto my bed. "Yours?"

"Afternoon classes were cancelled."

"Lucky." I heard him take another bite. "Do you think you can help me with my homework? It's math and you're really good at that, so..."

"Of course," I said, smirking at my laptop. I'd been missing him all day; this was perfect. "When would you like to work on it?"

"Whenever." I could imagine him shrugging. "If you're not too busy, we could work on it now just to get it out of the way. I only have one worksheet."

"Alright." I leant back and shut my laptop, then pushed my chair away and stood. I finally allowed myself to look at him again, and I couldn't help but notice just how pretty he was, though this was hardly a new discovery on my part. Flawless ivory skin, plump, pink lips, hair as black as ink… I sat down next to him on my bed, making sure to keep at least a foot of space between us; but even that felt like too much.

"I'll go get my bookbag," he said, finishing the last bite of his apple. He left the room quickly and was back within a minute, the apple core nowhere to be seen. "So we're learning this new formula," he began, plopping onto my bed, backpack in both hands, "and I don't get it. At all."

I smirked. "You're usually good at math."

He sighed, his eyebrows knitting together into an adorably flustered expression. "Yeah, I know. It's pissing me off."

"Language, Sasuke."

He glowered at me, then unzipped his backpack. _"Anyway, _this stuff seriously doesn't make any sense. You should have seen Naruto's face today when he tried to solve a problem." Sasuke looked up at me, his lips turning upwards into a little, mischievous grin, and I bit my inner cheek to keep myself steady. "He cussed out the teacher and got sent to the office."

I lifted an eyebrow. "He cussed out a teacher?"

"Yep." Sasuke pulled out a binder and slid his backpack off the bed, his grin growing. "Nobody was surprised."

"He's always been a little…"

"Crazy?" Sasuke lifted an eyebrow, mirroring my expression. "It's Naruto. He doesn't know what sanity _is."_

I chuckled and saw Sasuke's face take on an entirely new quality. When he looked at me like that, his eyes so wide and smile so genuine, it made me feel like the most important person in the world.

"So," I said, daring to scoot a couple of inches closer. "Let's get started."

* * *

Tutoring Sasuke went well. I managed to keep my body's reactions under control and it was nice to spend time together, even doing something as mundane as math. It took some time, but eventually the lesson clicked for Sasuke; the look of proud comprehension on his face and the way he thanked me made my chest feel awfully strange. I chose to ignore that tightening feeling and the uncomfortable fluttering in my stomach, but all I wanted to do was wrap my arms around him and just...sit for a while. Together. Quietly. I wanted to listen to his heartbeat, run my fingers through his hair, press my lips against his cheek.

I'd never had the urge to do that to anyone.

I felt like a lovesick fool; I couldn't help it. The ways he made me feel… He could set my body on fire with lust; make my heart feel like it was going to burst from loving him so much; make me feel like I was losing my mind, going completely insane—but I didn't mind. And just the thought, just the _thought_ that he could ever return these feelings for me supplied me with enough happiness to last for the rest of my life.

He offered to help me make dinner that night, and I happily agreed. I made an effort to prolong any bodily contact for as long as I could while we cooked; it was almost like I was rewarding myself for being so good while I tutored him. When I brushed by him on my way to the fridge, I lingered for an extra moment, my hand on his arm, savoring the way it felt; when he needed help chopping up carrots and broccoli, I stood behind him, my arms around his body, barely an inch of air between us and my mouth dangerously close to his ear. I paid close attention to his reactions as I carefully tested our boundaries, and I wasn't disappointed with what I saw.

He was blushing something fierce by the time we sat down for dinner, and he seemed nervous—_really_ nervous. He was fidgeting and avoiding meeting my eyes—I wondered if I'd scared him somehow, and immediately began to feel guilty, thinking I'd gone too far. But no, upon closer inspection he didn't seem scared, he seemed...uncomfortable. Very, very uncomfortable. And all I'd done was touch him more than usual.

"Are you alright, Sasuke?" I asked. Even though I knew I probably needed to ease up a bit, I couldn't help the rugged tone of my voice. All that touching had affected me as well.

He nodded, staring attentively at the plate of food in front of him. He brought his chopsticks to his mouth—we'd decided to make chicken stir-fry that night—and took a small bite, chewing slowly. Then he began to stare at the floor.

I smirked. He was acting so shy, so reserved, so...unlike himself.

"Are you sure you're alright?"

"Yeah," he said, finally peeling his eyes away from the floor to look at me. He managed a smile and I gnawed at my inner cheek. Those lips were so tempting. "Do you wanna watch a movie tonight?"

I nodded. He asked me to watch a movie nearly every night and he had for at least the past two years, though I didn't say yes too frequently until recently. Thinking back on it, I know he was just desperate for excuses to spend time with me.

By the time we sat down to watch a movie, he seemed to have calmed down a good bit. He wasn't acting nervous or blushing anymore, so I figured now was as good a time as ever to try and test our boundaries again. That, and I was desperate for more stolen touches.

Normally when we watched movies one of us would sit on the recliner and one on the couch, or both of us would sit on opposite ends of the couch. Today, he chose to sit near the middle of the couch, so I did as well.

He glanced at me but then returned his attention to the television, scrolling through movie selections on Netflix, obviously not viewing my choice of seating as strange. Only when I shifted until our thighs touched did he wiggle a bit, but he didn't move away. I smirked to myself, stretching my left arm along the back of the couch, my hand dangling near the side of his face. He didn't move an inch.

Whatever movie he chose began, but I wasn't paying attention to it. All I could pay attention to was the pressure of Sasuke's thigh against my own and how close my hand was to his face. I could so easily have cupped it, caressed it, turned him to face me, kissed him—

"Uh, Nii-san?"

"Hm?" I blinked a few times. I must have zoned out.

"You're not watching the movie…" Sasuke met my eyes, a curious look spreading across his face. "Is something wrong?"

It was then I realized that I had been staring at him. How careless of me.

"No…" I said, and I had to clear my throat. But I didn't stop looking at him; our eye contact stretched on for a few more moments before he finally looked away, his cheeks a little darker in the glow of the television, and turned his attention back to the movie. The urge to lean forward and press my lips against his was so powerful at this point I almost thought I'd do it.

I tried to watch the movie this time, worried I might creep him out if I stared for too long, but midway through the flick I knew that if he looked at my lap, he'd be in for quite the surprise. I let my right hand fall into my lap, covering it, then allowed myself to shift even _closer_ to Sasuke. When I felt him squirming I thought I'd finally pushed too far, but then he leaned his head on my shoulder and my heart almost stopped.

"This is more comfortable," he mumbled, and I knew his face was probably red again. I allowed my arm to slip from the back of the couch onto his shoulder and began rubbing it in little circular motions with my thumb, savoring the feeling of his body pressed so closely to mine, a small smile on my face. We sat like this for a while, and eventually I began to play with his hair; I even let my nails lightly scrape against the nape of his neck, unable to help myself. He shivered slightly and I had to shut my eyes for a moment to prevent myself from shivering as well; then I resumed twirling his hair between my fingers as though nothing had happened.

When the movie ended and we were forced to move I was almost disappointed—but I reminded myself that this had been a very, very productive night, even if I couldn't remember so much as the name of the movie we'd watched. We went our separate ways after saying goodnight and getting ready for bed, and I took care of business as usual...but I had a feeling I might not have been the only one.

* * *

After that night I became more bold. Although I kept all of my actions innocent enough to be passed off as accidents, I knew Sasuke had begun to catch on. Once or twice I could have sworn I saw him smirking (though it could have been my imagination), but then he'd begin to blush and it was all I could do to keep from kissing him. I didn't know if he was flirting back or if I was just being too optimistic, but I would take what I could get.

Unfortunately, I received a call from our parents on Friday night. I thought nothing of it, knowing they liked to check up from time-to-time, but then they made their true intentions known: they were coming to visit for the weekend. I pretended I was delighted by the news and eventually we hung up, but this was truly a setback. Things had been going so well…

Later, when Sasuke and I were getting ready for bed, I gave him the news. He took it well enough and he even seemed excited at the prospect of seeing our parents after their three-week-long absence. If he was disappointed at all, he hid it well. This dampened my spirits, but only slightly.

The next morning, Sasuke and I got to work on cleaning up around the house. We never let things get too bad and even had the number of a cleaning service pinned to the fridge, but I always got a little nervous when our parents came to visit, thinking they'd find something wrong with how I kept up with things and decide travelling abroad wasn't right for them anymore. I never understood my irrational fear of them renouncing mine and Sasuke's freedom, but all I knew was that our parents moving back in was _not_ an idea I liked to entertain.

I was terribly lost in thought while I scrubbed the kitchen counters (even though they were practically spotless by now). I didn't like the fact that I was losing two days alone with Sasuke. I didn't like it all. I glanced at my little brother from the corner of my eye, watching him wash dishes at the sink. _I wonder what you'__re thinking about…_

I was yanked away from my thoughts when Sasuke decided to spray me with the sink's detachable house. I hissed, dropping the rag I'd been holding and bringing my hands to cover my face before it finally tapered off. It was_ freezing._

"What the hell?" I growled. My bangs were wet and sticking to my forehead, and the front of my shirt was soaked right through. "What was that for?"

"You were staring at me...again." Sasuke smirked, an _almost_ flirtatious glint in his eyes. "I thought I'd bring you back down to Earth."

A smirk curled my own lips as I stalked towards Sasuke and yanked the hose from his hands; he didn't put up much of a struggle, but, nevertheless, I was still stronger than him. As I pointed it straight at his face his eyes widened hilariously wide and he held his hands in front of him, palms out, and began to back away.

"C-Come on, Aniki—let's be reasonable." My smirk grew even wider. Aniki? He hadn't called me that in years.

"Are you scared?" I asked, my smirk threatening to turn into a grin. I kept it in check, but this entire situation was just too amusing.

"Pfft." He puffed out his chest and dropped his hands. "Of course not."

I pressed my finger against the trigger, letting loose a harsh spray of ice-cold water. He shrieked, flinging his hands in front of his face and torso to try and protect himself—but his efforts were entirely in vain.

"You're a jerk!" he said once it stopped, his expression playfully flustered. I chuckled, making like I was going to spray him again, but then his hand was over mine, trying to get the hose away from me. "Give it!"

"Now, now, Sasuke," I said, "you're not strong enough." I lifted the hose, holding it out of his reach, and his slippery hand slid away.

"Tch!" he growled, beginning to pout the way he always did when I denied him something. He glared straight at me with his lower lip pushed out, his childish expression never faltering, but then I felt his hand begin to slide somewhere else. I glanced down at my chest, startled to find his fingers hooked at the neckline of my sopping wet gray button-up, lightly pulling it down.

"Please, Aniki?"

Our eyes met once again, and my breathing grew shallower. What was he doing?

I hadn't realized how worked up this roughhousing had gotten me until Sasuke decided to press his wet body closer, still reaching for the nozzle with one hand, the fingers of his other forcing the first and second buttons of my shirt to pop. My breathing was becoming frantic and my pants were already too tight—but how could I react any differently with my wet little brother pressed so close?

"If you won't give it to me," he said, his voice uncharacteristically low and eyes drooping, "I'll have to take it by force."

Sasuke seemed intent on practically climbing my body to get to nozzle, but then, when I felt him brush against my erection, he froze. I held my breath, knowing that this was definitely the farthest our boundaries had been pushed. Now what was he going to do?

"Big Brother…" I shivered as his eyes grew wide, boring into mine. "What..." I bit my lip, unable to say a single word, the nozzle limply hanging from my hand.

The doorbell rang and we hastily broke apart from each other, both of our faces flushed crimson. We were still soaked and our shirts were stuck to our chests, our hair to our cheeks and foreheads, and Sasuke's eyes...to my groin. I set the nozzle aside and made no move to cover myself, knowing that I had already unintentionally stepped one foot over the invisible line. I almost expected to see disgust on his face, or something close to it, at least, but all I saw were curiosity and...surprise. Complete and utter surprise.

"Nii-san…" He looked at my face then, his blatant curiosity playing out over his features and through his widened eyes.

The doorbell rang again and I cleared my throat.

"Why don't you answer the door, Sasuke?" I said, eager to get away from the situation. "I think I should go change."

Sasuke nodded even though he needed to change just as much as I did, if not more, but I think he understood why it wouldn't be good for me to face our parents at that moment. After one last fleeting glance at the obvious tent in my jeans, he turned on his heel and bounded out of the kitchen and towards the front door. I headed in the opposite direction, up the stairs and to my room to change into something dry and try to calm myself down.

Sasuke had felt my erection. Not only that, but he'd _stared _at it. Openly. Unabashedly. _Hell,_I thought, looking down, _he even popped two buttons on my shirt._

Shaking my head in awe, I made my way to my closet. I quickly picked out a new shirt and changed, then decided my pants weren't really wet enough to need changing and my bangs would be dry soon enough.

I knew there was no way I was going to be able to calm down anytime soon, not after that, so I adjusted myself so that my dick stuck under the waistband of my boxers. This way it was harder to tell how worked up I was, and, hopefully, it would just wither away on its own. I could only hope.

I hurried downstairs, worried that our parents might get suspicious of why I was taking so long, only to find our mother hugging the life out of Sasuke and our father perusing the living room with a stoic expression, seemingly searching for any errant pieces of dust.

"Hello, Tou-san, Kaa-san," I said, bowing slightly at the waist. Although Sasuke and I weren't very traditional ourselves, aside from the nicknames we occasionally made use of, our parents appreciated us honoring our Japanese heritage whenever we got the chance. We usually switch between addressing them in English and Japanese.

"Itachi," my father nodded with a grunt. "I see you've been taking care of things here."

Clearly, he was in a good mood.

"Yes, father." I turned to my mother just in time to catch her hug. Her arms were tight around my waist and I nearly grunted, but then she was holding my face in her hands, turning it this way and that, seemingly making sure I wasn't injured in some way, shape, or form.

When she was satisfied that yes, I wasn't broken, she backed farther away and wiped at her eyes with the back of her hand. "I missed you boys so much!" she said with a watery smile.

"We missed you too," Sasuke said, coming to stand beside her. She smiled at him and wiped at her eyes again, then composed herself with a deep breath.

"Now, would you mind explaining why the both of you are so wet?" she laughed, messing up Sasuke's damp hair with her hand. He grinned hugely, soaking up her affection like a sponge.

"We got into a water fight in the kitchen," I said. I stole a look at Sasuke from the corner of my eye and noticed his cheeks beginning to darken. I smirked at this.

"A water fight?" my father asked, his voice flat. I nodded, dragging my eyes to him and wiping the smirk off my face quicker than it had come.

"We were cleaning the kitchen and decided to have a little bit of...fun." I peeked at Sasuke again, catching his eye. He quickly looked at the floor.

Our father grunted, drawing my attention again. "As long as you both clean up."

"Of course, father," I said. I heard Sasuke clear his throat and my eyes went back to him.

"Well...I should probably go change too," he said, and scurried out of the room. It took all of my strength to keep my eyes from following him as he left.

This was going to be a long weekend—I could already feel it.

* * *

Our parents settled into their room rather quickly and left Sasuke and I to our own devices, as per usual. It was nice to see them, I had to admit, but I could only wish their timing hadn't been so...off. If the doorbell hadn't interrupted us, who knew what would have happened.

I clenched my fist.

I _wanted_ to know.

It was pretty obvious how I felt about Sasuke now, at least in the physical sense. He couldn't have any idea about how deep my feelings actually ran, but between what happened today and how touchy-feely I'd been for the past few days, I was sure he was piecing it together, if he hadn't already. And hell, maybe he _was _flirting back. I mean, cuddling up to your older brother on the couch (multiple nights in a row, I might add) might seem innocent enough, but pair that with practically crawling all over him and blatantly _staring _at his erection, and things got a little tricky.

I needed to up the ante, really see where we stood. I was getting sick of these blurred lines, this guise of innocence, and since I'd already thrown myself out there with today's stunt I might as well see how far I could take it. But I'd have to wait until our parents left.

I sighed and laid back on my bed, staring blankly at the ceiling. Why was their timing so awful?

I heard a knock at my door, and my eyes darted towards it. "Come in."

To my surprise it wasn't one of our parents, but Sasuke instead. I sat up in bed as he walked in, a little smile on my face. His lips stretched into some awkwardly contorted semblance of a smile, causing my own expression to change.

"Is something wrong?" I was suddenly worried—extremely so. Maybe I'd scared him off, disgusted him; maybe he was here to tell me that he never wanted to speak to me again—

"No, nothing's wrong," he said quickly, scratching the back of his neck. He wouldn't meet my eyes for longer than a second before focusing on something else, which meant he was lying. I took a deep breath. "I just wanted to know if I could borrow your laptop. It's for...homework."

I glanced at it from the corner of my eye. Ah, yes, my laptop—the thing that had started all of this.

"Of course." I jerked my head in its direction and he nodded his thanks before walking over and grabbing it. By the time he left I was on my way to becoming a nervous wreck, my hands trembling of their own volition no matter how forcefully I tried to still them. I must have disgusted him; he probably hated me now.

I needed to distract myself.

* * *

When Sasuke gave my laptop back around an hour or so later, he hardly looked at me. I had to swallow down the strange lump that kept forming in my throat whenever I thought about it; to keep my mind off things I'd hunkered down at my desk and got to work on my homework. But there was no point. My mind was far away.

I was tempted to scroll through the modem's history again, just to see what he'd been up to for that whole hour. I had a feeling he hadn't actually been doing homework, at least not the entire time, but I had no clue what else he could have been doing. He didn't seem as though he was in the mood for anything else.

Deciding it couldn't hurt, I cracked open my laptop and brought up the modem's history. At first it was nothing but educational resources, but the farther back I scrolled, the stranger his searches became. They were so strange, in fact, that I completely forgot about how upset I'd been within a moment of laying eyes on them.

**Incest in real life**

**Familial sexual relations**

**Is incest normal**

**I made my brother hard**

I cringed at that one.

But when my eyes settled on the next…

**I think I'm in love with my brother**

...I could hardly contain my excitement.

* * *

I was in a much better mood after snooping—_much. _Sasuke was questioning his feelings for me! This was exactly what I'd hoped for, practically been _praying _for. As soon as I saw him in the hallway on the way downstairs, it was incredibly difficult to keep myself from dragging him into the nearest closet and kissing him senseless. If our parents hadn't been home, I may have done just that.

We sat down for a family brunch, all four of us. We decided to eat outside on the patio, as the weather was unusually warm, and our parents told us of their most recent destination (Morocco), and plans for their future destination (Nepal). With these announcements came another bigger, more important one: their next visit home wouldn't be for another three months.

Our mother went on and on about it, saying that they'd cancel their trip and stay home if we wanted them to, that she missed her babies, that she felt like a terrible mother for never being home. I kindly reminded her that their travels were for business, to which my father firmly agreed, silencing her worried voice. Brunch continued.

I stole glances at Sasuke the entire time, and there were a few times when he caught my eye, only to turn his attention back to the plate of scrambled eggs and tomato in front of him. His face was almost as red as his favorite fruit.

Finally, brunch was over, and we all settled down in the living room to watch a movie (with the exception of my father, who decided to lay down in their room). My mother picked something that looked rather unappealing and cuddled near Sasuke on the couch. I chose the recliner.

The entire day was uneventful and relatively boring. Aside from the few glances he and I shared, Sasuke and I hardly interacted aside from what was expected of us. I was simply thankful that the day was over—which meant our parents would be leaving soon.

On Sunday, the day before our parents' departure, the weather was unexpectedly nice. It was only the beginning of April, so we'd seen nothing but light drizzle and cloudy skies thus far, but Sunday was sunny and surprisingly dry. So, naturally, Sasuke suggested we take a swim in our backyard pool. He's always loved swimming.

I hadn't been sure if it was safe for swimming in after sitting stagnant for so long, but our parents, being how they are, assured us that they could get it fixed up by the afternoon. They came through, and by twelve-thirty the pool was spotless and clear and a pool maintenance van was pulling out of the driveway. Sasuke was the first one in.

Though he'd convinced me to _at least _put on my swim trunks and sit near the pool, I was wary of the entire situation. My very attractive, very sexually-stimulating little brother sopping wet in nothing but a pair of swim trunks? I'm amazed I lasted as long as I did.

I feel like he knew what he was doing, in a way. He certainly seemed intent on getting me in the pool no matter how many times I protested. Eventually, after five minutes of listening to him whine and dealing with him relentlessly trying to splash me, I waded in.

The water was cold and I immediately wanted to get out, but then he swam over to me, grabbing my arm and pulling me towards the deeper section. I resisted the urge to shiver as the water eventually came to stop right below my collar bones, but my teeth began to chatter nonetheless.

"I missed swimming," Sasuke said, letting my arm float away. His eyes were on everything but me.

"I miss not feeling like I'm going to freeze to death," I said, my voice flat. Sasuke looked at me then, a surprised look on his face.

"You're cold?"

"Obviously."

"Oh," he said, his voice small. I lifted an eyebrow, unamused. "Move around or something."

I sighed and mentally readied myself to exit the pool, when the barest ghost of an idea flitted through my mind. Without warning I lifted my hands and splashed Sasuke, giving him less than a second to block himself. He yelped as it hit him and disappeared under the water, only to resurface a few seconds later, his hair plastered to his head.

"Jerk," he muttered. I smirked and lifted my hands again, but he was quicker—he splashed me first. I closed my eyes and mouth as a small wave crashed over me, smoothing a portion of my hair against my scalp, then slowly opened my eyes. By the time Sasuke blinked I was under the water, swimming closer to him until my fingers touched his pale stomach. He thrashed as I tickled him, kicking his feet wildly, and almost clocked me in the face before I was able to resurface.

He didn't waste a second before splashing me again when I came up for air, and I nearly breathed in a gulp of pool water; but I was quick to recover, and decided that the best course of action was to disable his ability to splash by tickling him again. (Or maybe I just wanted to touch him.)

I lifted my hands and splashed him, being sure to make the largest wave I could, and delighted in his half-laughed shriek of surprise. While he was momentarily dazed I dove under water and swam the few feet between us, careful to come up behind him. He looked over his shoulder, eyes wide and curious, but was unable to escape once I wrapped my arms around his midsection.

"Caught you," I whispered near his ear. He opened his mouth to say something, but then I was tickling him again and he was thrashing and laughing; he almost hit me in the face before I caught his wrists and held them at his sides. We both fell still then, him panting and my skin sizzling from how close our bodies were.

"You...are...a...total...jerk," he panted out, leaning his head back against my chest and peering up at me. He wasn't kicking anymore to stay afloat, but instead his legs were lightly wrapped around mine, keeping him from sinking the couple of inches to the bottom. A shiver ran over my entire body the longer he looked at me and I guess Sasuke must have felt it, because then his cheeks began to redden, his eyes bulged, and he tried to squirm away. For some odd reason, this only made my grip on his wrists tighten. He immediately froze again.

"I-Itachi, what are you doing?" he asked, his voice low and urgent. I smirked, bringing my head down until I could nuzzle the side of his face. I felt him stiffen. "Nii-san?"

I knew if he were to squirm the wrong way, press his bottom too close to my groin, he would once again be subject to my body's unfortunate reactions. But this time, I began to _want_ him to feel what he did to me—what he'd been _doing _to me. I smirked; I had no reservations at this point. Finally, I could touch him.

"Just be quiet," I whispered against his ear. He made a strange little noise in the back of his throat. "Our parents are in the living room."

"Wh-What do you me—"

He clamped his mouth shut the moment I let go of his wrists and took hold of his hips, my fingers rubbing little circles onto his skin. I pressed him closer to me, allowing him to feel my arousal, and the choked whimper he gave was absolutely _beautiful, _even if he was trying to stifle it. Slowly, I brought my hands up higher and higher while I lightly grinded against him, until my fingers glided past his ribs and to two very hard points on his chest. When I touched them (more like brushed by them, my touch was so light) his mouth fell open and a moan that was just a _little_ too loud spilled out.

"Shh," I whispered in his ear, keeping my eye on the back door. Our parents shouldn't have been able to see or hear anything from all the way inside the house, but there was no such thing as being too safe. I myself didn't even understand what was happening between us; I could only imagine trying to explain me and Sasuke's closeness to our parents if they got curious and ventured outside or peered out the window.

"D-Don't," Sasuke whimpered as I touched them again, this time pressing my fingers a little harder and rubbing them back-and-forth. His hands finally flew up to take hold of my wrists, but his grip was shaky and soft.

"Why not?" I rasped against his ear. I thrust my cock against his firm ass a little harder, absolutely _l__oving _the way he felt against me and his every shaky little gasp. The smirk on my face felt downright devilish.

"I-I—We can't…Itachi..." He seemed at a loss for words. Granted, this had come on rather quickly, but after all those days of wanting him and now knowing that there was a very, very good chance he wanted me too...I just couldn't pass this up. I needed to know for certain.

"Why not, Sasuke?" I breathed out before attaching my lips to his neck. He whined and I felt him shiver almost violently as I nipped and sucked at all the skin I could reach, leaving angry little bite marks here and there. His skin tasted like chlorine and I got a bit of water in my mouth, but I wasn't about to complain.

"You...You're my brother…" he choked out. I'd expected that. I chuckled, my chest rumbling slightly and sharing vibrations with Sasuke.

"And that's why you should trust me," I said, brushing my lips against his cheek. I heard him whimper, and as I pulled away slightly, he turned his face towards me, his cheeks the most adorable shade of pink.

And I just couldn't help myself.

I connected our lips carefully, gently, and ceased my rhythmic rutting against him. I wanted him, yes, but I also wanted him to know how much I cared for him, even if one were to omit my burning desire to touch him. I doubted a kiss alone was enough to convey my feelings, but I was almost positive this was his first—I wanted it to be as pleasant as possible, even if the circumstances were rather...unorthodox.

He gasped against my mouth and I kept my eyes open at first; his were practically closed. After a couple of moments I pulled my face away, taking a moment to simply look at him, to make sure I hadn't startled him too badly with my brash behavior. His eyes fluttered open, only for a second, and he looked at me with so much fucking _lust _and then I was kissing him again, a little harder—but not too hard—and he was moaning into my mouth and his lips were so soft and warm and he tasted sweet and oh God he moved his ass against my—

"Boys?"

We broke away so quickly a little tidal wave formed between us right before the screen door swung open and our mother stepped outside. Both of us could hardly catch our breaths—I could tell even from the opposite side of the pool that Sasuke was practically gasping—and our faces were ridiculously red. I thought my heartbeat would never slow down. I chanced a look at our mother, completely mortified, thinking she might have seen us; but she seemed content as ever, a light smile on her face. I guess she hadn't.

Thank God.

"Are you boys okay?" she asked, looking between the two of us. "You seem pretty out of breath!"

I smirked.

"Yes, we're fine, mother," I said, stopping to clear my throat. I sounded like I was coming down with the flu, my voice was so scratchy. "We were just racing." Lies trickled freely from my lips, and I could feel Sasuke looking at me with awe.

Our mother nodded, dismissing her concerns. My smirk grew. That was far too easy.

"Well, I just wanted to let you both know that there's sandwich stuff and juice in the fridge if you get hungry." She smiled at both of us, then turned towards the door. "Love you!" she called, then the screen door fell shut behind her.

Following our mother's exit, there was a period of intense staring between Sasuke and myself that spanned over several minutes. Neither of us seemed to know what to say. I was afraid I might have pushed too far, and now that my head had cleared a bit (not completely, but enough), I hadn't a clue what to say for myself. It was like a sheet of ice had formed between Sasuke and I; the water began to feel too cold again.

"I think I'm gonna go eat," Sasuke finally said. He looked at me for a second, gave me a little, secretive smile, then was out of the pool and headed towards the house.

I could only look after him wistfully, wondering how far things would have gone if our parents weren't such a damned interference.

* * *

**Aannnnd now I have to write the entire third part because I have less written than I thought I did. *whines and grumbles and kicks a puppy* **

**Thank you so much for reading and PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW AND FAVORITE AND FOLLOW *THROWS GLITTER AND HEARTS INTO THE AIR* YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO~**

**Hopefully I'll have the third (and final?) part written by this weekend! No promises, though, because I'm pretty lazy and I actually have a life outside of the internet. **

**Kinda.**

**Bye for now. c:**


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